Love. It could either be the most beautiful or the worst thing that could happen to a person. It has the tendency to bring unlimited and uncontrollable smile on the face or to send you in a never ending depression, ruining the best part of your life.
It just happens. You never know how and when did it happen but, BAM! You find yourself having little goosebumps and feel your heart skip while talking to that person. No matter how easily you can flirt with others, you always seem to fail to bring the correct words and there’s always a slight fear of ruining it. As you lie down to sleep, you visualise all the happy moments with the person, all the words you want to say to them, only to disappoint yourself at the end by not bringing a single one of it to your tongue.
It’s more of a dilemma when you are very good friends with that person but just can’t bring yourself to confess it. How’d you react if out of nowhere, the person who you love, being your very good friend, asks you if you’re in love, while you’re just always happily pretending to not care about love at all? How’d you react if that same person asks you to share with them first if you ever fall in love? How’d you hold yourself if you have this strong urge to scream and tell the world and specially that person that you’re living for them only? Just how’d you bring yourself to waive it off with a smile, telling that you were only joking and you just don’t want to be in love, just because of the fear that you might hurt that person if you confess right away?
I’m now getting sick of this dilemma. I want to end it. I just want to confess it to her. But again, there’s this thought and fear of losing her even as a friend which halts that strong urge inside me to scream and tell to the world about how much I love her and I’m left again to face it, to make sure I make her keep smiling and don’t offer a single sorrow, to enjoy the best part of having her trust me and discuss her issues with me, to create little moments with her which cherish and satisfy me while I think of her, to keep a collection of those moments and wait for that day where I could review them all with her. The dilemma continues and I keep fearing if I’ll lose her to somebody else.