Every night, I open this page to put out the loneliness that surrounds me after 2 AM. You may argue that why don’t I sleep when its that late in night. Be in my place, force yourself to sleep to enjoy the nightmares and we’ll surely talk then.
As it stands, my two coolest friends are nowhere to be found, thanks to universities. One of the best friends sleep before 12 and the other is not in right frame of mind. Moreover, the person that I dearly want to talk to these days, is well, busy in being sad over someone else. Welcome to the life of the pioneer of friendzone and BFFzone. As I type this, Media Player has decided to troll me by playing the song which we have branded as our “anthem”. Dear life, way to go!
As the loneliness draws upon, songs stop making sense. Skipping each and every song on shuffle before it plays a sad song. Emotions overflow, only to be betrayed by words. So much to blab, so little motivation to move the tongue. The only consolation are the images revolving around of the delusions created by mind as I try to sleep with a smile.
Even though there are no regrets for not having a relationship or anything but there are moments when it feels a failure at life when you don’t have someone to point towards and proudly say, “Hey, this is the one who matters more than myself to me. I can wake her up in middle of her comforting sleep after a tiring day, just to tell her that I’m missing her without any second doubts. This is the one who is on my mind when I close and open my eyes. This is the one, to whom, rest of my life has been dedicated to.”
While battling with all those thoughts, at a far corner in the brain, a voice rises that shouts, and I quote,
Love is a fairy tale. A fantasy. A video game. You enjoy it for a moment before reality draws upon you. No one lives for others. It is every person for themselves.
If you’re wondering in which frame of mind I have composed this, take a look below and you can totally judge me! (and follow me too if you aren’t already)
Everything about this finite life 